And all I’ve seen since 18 hours ago is green eyes and freckles and your smile in the back of my mind

     I’m in love with the chase, the feelings, the butterflies, those sleepless nights    wondering if you are feeling the same way about me that i feel  about    you, that night will forever be in my heart. I’m in love with good morning texts, long car rides ,unmade beds, the hazel in your piercing green eyes, old books and the way you make me smile.

I Just Want To Be Home

It’s christmas time another  winter day has come and gone and I just want to go home. Let me go home. I need a break from here, I need to  go home i need to be away from these people. I miss my friends, I miss my mom, dad and brother. Lately, I’m trying to figure out why I’m actually here and why I picked a place so far. Maybe it’s just homesickness for the moment, but I don’t want to be here right now. I just want to be home. I miss New York City, my dog and being able to have privacy in my own room. i miss my morning walks with grandpa and i most of all i miss my grandma. I need to be home as soon as possible. 

I Knew You Were Trouble When You Walked In

Once upon a time, a few mistakes ago you were in my sights and I found out you were an asshole. An pretentious asshole that is a belligerent drunk , does drugs and than thinks he is better than everyone.  Once bitten, twice shy, shame on me to think that you kind of mysterious and a actually cool guy. Shame on me, to think that you were different not a regular college guy who wants to get everyone’s pants but then again Fool me once shame on you, but fool me twice shame on me. it was my fault putting him on that imaginary pedalstal, and just liking the thought of him. So what if we have the same the interests, and music, so what if i felt something in my gut that he might be different. But then sometimes that little voice inside you can be wrong and deep down inside I knew that he was trouble when he walked in. 

It was almost enchanted to meet you.

That night was sparkling, I was pretty much wonderstruck when the first time I saw him. and I can say that  I was blushing all the way back to my second floor dorm room, wondering who do you love and pacing back and forth wishing you were at my door.  It was one look and I knew from that one glance that I didn’t want you to be in love with someone else, I don’t want someone waiting on him. But then again my life is far from a  Taylor Swift song…. Okay okay I over exaggerated about this a tad bit , but don’t girls just do that stuff, think about things to the extreme? I am daydreamer and always get carried away. But there is a guy that I think is extremely cute, who doesn’t remember my name( my luck right?) and he’s in two of my classes ( and I met him outside drunk so he really didn’t remember). He probably won’t remember my name or the fact that I even exist or i’m actually writing a long paragraph on tumblr about him. So despite of our lack of human interaction I was mesmerized and I have a really good feeling about him which is very rare with guys because my track record with guys is like two.  It was enchanting to meet him even though it was a couple eye catches and a hand shake 

Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you

So what he give me butterflies everytime he texts me? so what the hairs on my arms stick up when he hugs me ? It’s never going to happen and i am prepared for that. I’m stuck in the friend zone and i know it. he is the guy that im suppossed to hate; stubborn, sacarstic, moody, times a narcissistic asshole. He erks me in everyway possible where I cam just utterly speachless. But with all those little things make me want to be with him even more. I’m a friend in his eyes, but i need to get this off my chest. love is a funny thing, its like jumping out of airplane hoping that parachute will open. If it opens it means your save, it doesn’t your screwed and hurt.

If he only knew that he is the only boy that makes my heart beat faster and slower at the same time.

Loose Lips Sink Ships.

fake,slut,ugly,paranoid,fat,scared, loner.. words hurt. and when you say things that hurt people, it will come back around and hurt you. You will be alone with no one to talk to. high school is almost over and people are going top forget you, move on with their lives. Yet you will always wonder what did you to deserve this ? remember words hurt and loose lips sink ship and love no one is coming for your rescue.