Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you

So what he give me butterflies everytime he texts me? so what the hairs on my arms stick up when he hugs me ? It’s never going to happen and i am prepared for that. I’m stuck in the friend zone and i know it. he is the guy that im suppossed to hate; stubborn, sacarstic, moody, times a narcissistic asshole. He erks me in everyway possible where I cam just utterly speachless. But with all those little things make me want to be with him even more. I’m a friend in his eyes, but i need to get this off my chest. love is a funny thing, its like jumping out of airplane hoping that parachute will open. If it opens it means your save, it doesn’t your screwed and hurt.